The Beat Surrender

Oh God. How have I gone from reviewing Slayer to this? Lock up your daughters, here he comes – straight from the bowels of the eighties; taking no prisoners, lippy in hand. “Ze Suicide” is the day-glo album by Stevie Ze Suicide (presumably the son of Mr and Mrs Ze Suicide).

So who is this enigmatic stranger? Well, he was drummer for the UK Subs as Steve Roberts before he became ‘Stevie Ze Suicide’, the “King of NoiZE”. Don’t look at me, this is just what I’ve found out from Google.

He plays guitar, sings and drums on the demo. Ordinarily you’d be impressed with this, wouldn’t you? But no, this is not due to any exceptional musicianship, I think it’s because it’s done on the cheap, that’s all. Or maybe his ego wouldn’t allow for people with any skill to play on the demo. Considering his drumming ‘credentials’, his stickwork is pretty basic, to say the least. Vocally, he sings like a spoilt brat that wants a good smack. To sound cool you’ll get a random ‘Woo’ off him every so often for good measure.

And as for his guitaring – well, I don’t know for sure, but I can imagine he sticks his tongue out of the corner of his mouth and frowns a lot while playing. It’s not the most blistering fretwork I’ve ever heard, put it that way. We’re also treated to just about every stereotypical glam riff you’ve ever squirmed through – many of them crammed into the one song – “Don’t Cry”.

A lot of the songs have your typical badly spelt title – where the ’s’ is replaced with a ‘z’ for example. You’ve got “Rodeo Boyz”, “Bad Girlz” and the mind boggling “Delinquent Wrekx”. Track 9 “Sex and Drugs” (shouldn’t that be Sekz and Drugz?) is the least repellent to me; with this song Stevie almost redeems himself by skirting on the fringes of punk with his singing and guitaring. But the moment is lost oh too quickly.

Continue